Do you think it is cool to throw parties on two consecutive WEEK NIGHTS? Do you think it’s cool to ride your fixie to a party in south Berkeley and then stand around outside on the sidewalk drinking 40s out of paper bags and listening to Massive Attack with the system on blast? It’s not. It makes you look like douche bags. You’re making everything smell like pot and sound like angst. I’m sorry your parents didn’t love you enough, but seriously cut it out. Some people actually have the wherewithal to hold down steady jobs, and those same people have to be at work at nine o’clock in the fucking morning tomorrow. Knock it the fuck off.
Sincerely,
Your hate filled, job holding, upstairs neighbor.
***
Note 1: Karma, bitch that she is, is apparently paying me back for all the times I partied recklessly on weeknights during college.
Note 2: I seriously just looked out my window, and I have a laundry list of stereotypes:
3 fixies
2 girls wearing flannel shirts, knit hats, and horn rimmed glasses
3 guys wearing skinny jeans
4 40s of steel reserve
1 douchebag moustache
I’ve never even met these people, and yet I hate them with the burning fury of a million fiery suns.
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